UK Life Coaching Journal

Putting yourself in someone else’s position    

How many times have you heard people say, ‘I wonder what it feels like to be in that person’s position?’ But if you really want to know, all you need to do is, literally, to act in exactly the same way. You can never become an expert in body language just by reading books about it - proficiency will only come after constant practice. Although this may at first seem a strange technique to recommend, it’s a fact that one of the best ways to understand another person’s body language is to mimic the way he or she moves, and moves around. Most children are natural mimics. You’ll find that, like once having learned how to ride a bicycle, you will soon remember how it’s done. The more precisely you mimic the movements, the more exactly you will feel the mixture of feelings that the other person feels. And here’s something else you’ll find out - if you then begin to exaggerate that individual’s habitual actions, you will feel those emotions in a more intense form.

You don’t ever again need to wonder how it feels to be in another person’s place. Instead, you can actually put yourself into it. It’s a simple but immensely effective technique that will enable you to experience at first hand - to understand, empathise with, and honestly relate to - ‘hidden agenda’ feelings and emotions in other people. The more you practice, the more insight you will gain and the nearer you will get to optimum levels of communication in your working and personal life.