UK Life Coaching Journal

Is it all just a matter of luck?     Comments (0)

The attainment of a personally authentic life is not anything to do with random chance, or with simply being lucky. If it were, in the long run all of us would be equally fulfilled (or unfulfilled!)  But we all know people who are consistently comfortable in their skins. Obviously this can’t be due to a permanent lucky streak - there has to be another explanation to account for what at first seems an inexplicable state of affairs. The real answer is simple – ‘luck’ is nothing else but the personal ability to see and to accurately evaluate, things, events, people and situations, as they really are. That is, to be in touch with, and totally aware of, what really is happening at any given moment. read more…

Putting yourself in someone else’s position     Comments (0)

How many times have you heard people say, ‘I wonder what it feels like to be in that person’s position?’ But if you really want to know, all you need to do is, literally, to act in exactly the same way. You can never become an expert in body language just by reading books about it - proficiency will only come after constant practice. Although this may at first seem a strange technique to recommend, it’s a fact that one of the best ways to understand another person’s body language is to mimic the way he or she moves, and moves around. Most children are natural mimics. You’ll find that, like once having learned how to ride a bicycle, you will soon remember how it’s done. The more precisely you mimic the movements, the more exactly you will feel the mixture of feelings that the other person feels. And here’s something else you’ll find out - if you then begin to exaggerate that individual’s habitual actions, you will feel those emotions in a more intense form.

You don’t ever again need to wonder how it feels to be in another person’s place. Instead, you can actually put yourself into it. It’s a simple but immensely effective technique that will enable you to experience at first hand - to understand, empathise with, and honestly relate to - ‘hidden agenda’ feelings and emotions in other people. The more you practice, the more insight you will gain and the nearer you will get to optimum levels of communication in your working and personal life.